Wilde Gray Yonder
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Leader of men. Leader of HENCHmen.
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« on: January 29, 2005, 12:35:14 pm » |
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A short (yes, really) story which I wrote a while ago and have now translated into English. It won't take too long to read, and all comments are welcome.
If you absolutely need a genre, I think "horror" describes it, but a rather metaphysical and non-gory kind of horror.
Finally, to explain the title: Summanus was the Etruscan, and later Roman, god of thunder-at-night. You'll see what that has to do with the story...
EDIT: If you want to read this story, PM me and I'll mail it to you.
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« Last Edit: May 27, 2006, 12:49:52 pm by Immaterial »
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We lived happily forever, so the story goes,
But somehow we missed out on that pot of gold.
But we'll try best that we can
To carry on.
- Styx, Come Sail Away
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Dagdamor
Guest
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« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2005, 05:29:51 am » |
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Well, *that* was scary.
After reading I still feel like somebody (something?) is here, it's near, behind me... (*shudder*) no, no, it's just Chris' fantasy, I shouldn't believe in that. The writing itself is great, I read it easily on the single breath, but the plot... poor Emelie, I don't know what had happened with her actually, but, you know, for some reason I don't really believe it will be better than what she had before. There was a whole life ahead her... but she sensibly decided to leave it... I cannot understand this. Poor girl.
Overall: very interesting and thrilling story. Recommended to read. You won't be disappointed.
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Archonix
Whining Artist
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Senior Secretariat
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I see things I don't want to see.
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« Reply #2 on: February 02, 2005, 11:49:22 am » |
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Freaky. I like the last line especially.  |
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In the world it is called Tolerance, but in hell it is called Despair, the sin that believes in nothing, cares for nothing, seeks to know nothing, interferes with nothing, enjoys nothing, hates nothing, finds purpose in nothing, lives for nothing, and remains alive because there is nothing for which it will die.
Dorothy L Sayers
once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot xxx galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered, " give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.
The hardest thing to explain is the glaringly evident which everybody had decided not to see.
Ayn Rand
Parallel Lives current status:
A Road Not Taken: Complete
Where I Belong: Complete
Less than a Pearl: Back on top again...
Make up your mind!!
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Don Cobra
Semi-Solid Snake
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You are a member of reality
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« Reply #3 on: February 03, 2005, 10:04:59 am » |
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I think the effect was well achieved - the presentation of the story, and all. Nice effect. It looks like some of those ideas that other writers would spend days trying to get right, but you seem to pull it off effortlessly, like you were just playing. In my opinion, that's also the story's weakness, in my opinion: merely because the piece pales in comparison to your best works (e.g. Search For Zapp). Or maybe I'm not particularly thrilled by this kind of story. But even still, this gets a high rating from me. Say... 9. |
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Of How a World Is Built, my latest album, is available for free download. Get it now! Listen! Share! Distribute! Worship! Stereoblag: random self-indulgent crap about music and whatever else. "People will always be tempted to wipe their feet
On anything with 'Welcome' written on it" - Andy Partridge (XTC), Snowman
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Wilde Gray Yonder
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Leader of men. Leader of HENCHmen.
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« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2005, 20:14:38 pm » |
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Woo, thanks a lot, everyone! I'm happy now.  |
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We lived happily forever, so the story goes,
But somehow we missed out on that pot of gold.
But we'll try best that we can
To carry on.
- Styx, Come Sail Away
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Dark Mage
The Great Wizzard Bloke
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Good to be back.
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« Reply #5 on: February 04, 2005, 19:41:35 pm » |
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Can't sleep, darkness will get me... Can't sleep, darkness will get me...
Why, oh why do I keep reading these things at night?
Good story Chris, and very chilling!
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<Blomman> who was it that got married here?
<Alexander> Oh, that was a drunken night in Vegas I'd rather forget...
<Alexander> I mean... Graham and Chris.
<Blomman> really?
<Alexander> Yes.
<Blomman> not that i'm against that kind of thing, but isn't that like, uh, illegal in some states?
<Alexander> I could explain, but I don't want to.  ------------------------------------------------------ * Alexander is trying to avoid becoming one-dimensional. <Alexander> I've just had a terrible, frightening thought. <Alexander> I've been fleshing out Mara's character, right? Giving her depth? In the meantime, what's happening to *me*? <gkscotty> obviously she's siphoning off your "reality" <Alexander> Dear God. <Graham> She's a vampire! <Graham> A lesbian vampire! <gkscotty> pretty soon, it'll be Mara writing stories about Alex falling in love with Lisa. SHAMELESS PLUGS COMMENCINGI have a dA page. Check it out. It's like D&D, but everyone's a ninja.
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